Thursday, August 27, 2009
Healthcare
A discussion on nationalized health care:
"""
me: Health is a fundamental human right, much like the right to life, liberty, and expression. The US government should protect this right as does to protect these other rights.
him: But competition is the most important mechanism to guarantee efficiency, improve equality, and reduce all negative effects of greed. The only way we can make health care work is if the agents providing health care are put in competition with each other.
me: Well, as you know, the US government provides many basic service to it's citizens (actually to its residents): It spends money to pro-actively protect life through police force and fire companies (that makes effort to protects all residents from death).... It set up roads so people can travel, and do all those other things that people do on roads. This is done because it is recognized (and democratically agreed) that these are very very basic actions made to protect it's citizens and residents. I feel that health, basic health, life protection health care is a basic service. It should be provided for free, like police and fire company, and roads, ....
him: Well, no. The reason why that won't work, is the same reason why so many roads are broken with potholes and police fail to protect it's people, and police brutality and all kinds of injustices. It won't work because there is no competition. The natural selection mechanism is the only thing that will ensure that the best affordable service is provided.
me: Yeah! but precisely because we want to provide very basic service, which does not have a payoff directly to support these services, that it cannot be privatized. There is no way that they can provide that service AND still make money. e.g. paid police? nobody can afford that, and government provides it "at loss" The consequence of privatization is that substandard service will be provided and nobody will be healthy.
him: ...many examples about why competition will bring the bestest and britest out of people...
me: ...same example but change such that the competition forces people to do inhumane things because it optimizes criterion of competition...
him: well! fine! here's why it won't work! The reason why nationalized health care won't work is the same as if you asked the government to provide food for all of its people. They will fail.
me: .......................................................(long silence)...............[[ Mmmm, .......... Hmmmm... I change my mind. I do think governments will fail to provide basic food supply to its people.......... (they certainly have, repeatedly)... such a simple thing... and they fail at it... and health care, even basic health care is a more complicated thing. Hmmm........]] You are right.
him: [[happy with winning argument.]]
me: [[unhappy]] [[murmer in my breath, as Galileo, Health is as basic a right to human just as the earth moves around the sun]]
"""
"""
me: Health is a fundamental human right, much like the right to life, liberty, and expression. The US government should protect this right as does to protect these other rights.
him: But competition is the most important mechanism to guarantee efficiency, improve equality, and reduce all negative effects of greed. The only way we can make health care work is if the agents providing health care are put in competition with each other.
me: Well, as you know, the US government provides many basic service to it's citizens (actually to its residents): It spends money to pro-actively protect life through police force and fire companies (that makes effort to protects all residents from death).... It set up roads so people can travel, and do all those other things that people do on roads. This is done because it is recognized (and democratically agreed) that these are very very basic actions made to protect it's citizens and residents. I feel that health, basic health, life protection health care is a basic service. It should be provided for free, like police and fire company, and roads, ....
him: Well, no. The reason why that won't work, is the same reason why so many roads are broken with potholes and police fail to protect it's people, and police brutality and all kinds of injustices. It won't work because there is no competition. The natural selection mechanism is the only thing that will ensure that the best affordable service is provided.
me: Yeah! but precisely because we want to provide very basic service, which does not have a payoff directly to support these services, that it cannot be privatized. There is no way that they can provide that service AND still make money. e.g. paid police? nobody can afford that, and government provides it "at loss" The consequence of privatization is that substandard service will be provided and nobody will be healthy.
him: ...many examples about why competition will bring the bestest and britest out of people...
me: ...same example but change such that the competition forces people to do inhumane things because it optimizes criterion of competition...
him: well! fine! here's why it won't work! The reason why nationalized health care won't work is the same as if you asked the government to provide food for all of its people. They will fail.
me: .......................................................(long silence)...............[[ Mmmm, .......... Hmmmm... I change my mind. I do think governments will fail to provide basic food supply to its people.......... (they certainly have, repeatedly)... such a simple thing... and they fail at it... and health care, even basic health care is a more complicated thing. Hmmm........]] You are right.
him: [[happy with winning argument.]]
me: [[unhappy]] [[murmer in my breath, as Galileo, Health is as basic a right to human just as the earth moves around the sun]]
"""
Monday, May 04, 2009
your silence and my silence
"In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends"
-MLKJ.
I will admit, that I am silent more than I should be and often at important junctures. I hope to overcome this shortcoming though...
But, I also hope I will remember your silence and the silence of those around me.
-MLKJ.
I will admit, that I am silent more than I should be and often at important junctures. I hope to overcome this shortcoming though...
But, I also hope I will remember your silence and the silence of those around me.
Sunday, May 03, 2009
gota talk about that pig cold
Okay, so call me stupid, but why do they call the bird cold "avian flu" but the pig cold "swine flu" Does the parts of speech not match?
The adjective for of or pertaining to pig is "porcine" so..., correspondingly, "porcine flu".
Of course,... they never spoke of "bovine mania",... probably because it sounds like crazy _for_ cows, instead of "mad cows"
YMMV I suppose.
The adjective for of or pertaining to pig is "porcine" so..., correspondingly, "porcine flu".
Of course,... they never spoke of "bovine mania",... probably because it sounds like crazy _for_ cows, instead of "mad cows"
YMMV I suppose.
Thursday, March 05, 2009
Shakespear's Tombstone
Brilliant even in death:
And if it must be...Good friend for Jesus' sake forbear
To dig the dust enclosed here!
Blest be the man that spares these stones,
And curst be he that moves my bones.
Good friends for goodness sake forbear
To peek the register enclosed here!
Bless be men who spares the load,
And curse be he who mod's my code.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
肉麻博客strikes again
"""
Commit!?? That's what you do when you go to the insane asylum
"""
heheee, good one.
Commit!?? That's what you do when you go to the insane asylum
"""
heheee, good one.
Monday, February 16, 2009
The duality of love (来自肉麻恋爱博客）
"""
One time, a very dear friend told me that she permits her husband, departing for the wild wild far east, to engage in safe sex with other women--with the restriction that he must change partner each night, so that he does not fall in love with them... (so that he does not develop feelings...)
Recently, I've come to a similar decision... Except I told my s.o., who is also afar, that development of loving feelings is not only allowed but highly encouraged with and for other people, except that I have a limit too: that no physical relationship takes place, no exchange of fluids, and minimized touching of skin.
"""
sigh... what a sad turn of events for the owner of 肉麻博客。Looks like the puppy love will soon turn into a massacre! A blood bath!! What a travesty of all that is holy beween people!! What torture these two people put themselves and their Loving Other Halves through!!
uhh!! I cannot bear to read this blog any more !!!!!!!!!!!
One time, a very dear friend told me that she permits her husband, departing for the wild wild far east, to engage in safe sex with other women--with the restriction that he must change partner each night, so that he does not fall in love with them... (so that he does not develop feelings...)
Recently, I've come to a similar decision... Except I told my s.o., who is also afar, that development of loving feelings is not only allowed but highly encouraged with and for other people, except that I have a limit too: that no physical relationship takes place, no exchange of fluids, and minimized touching of skin.
"""
sigh... what a sad turn of events for the owner of 肉麻博客。Looks like the puppy love will soon turn into a massacre! A blood bath!! What a travesty of all that is holy beween people!! What torture these two people put themselves and their Loving Other Halves through!!
uhh!! I cannot bear to read this blog any more !!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, February 13, 2009
Saturday, February 07, 2009
好帅/美
祝英明神武盖世无双，人见人爱花见花开，打遍天下无敌手，情场杀手鬼见愁，晕倒一堆迷死一片的老Q打球得胜
我是英俊潇洒、玉树临风、天下无敌、人见人爱、花见花开、气死潘安、羞死宋玉、号称一朵梨花压海棠、宇宙第一高手,人送绰号玉面小飞龙、山崩地裂水倒流鬼见愁、美貌与智慧结合、英雄与侠义化身
天下无敌宇宙无双人见人爱花见花开男女老幼一律统杀金刚不坏旋风霹雳任意风格
神武英明盖世无双，人见人爱花见花开，打遍天下无敌手，情场杀手鬼见愁玉面飞龙，人称美貌无双心地善良，晕倒一片
宇宙超级无敌霹雳人见人爱花见花开车见车载十全九美青春美少女
玉树临风.风流潇洒
妩媚伶俐、天下无双、人见人爱、花见花开、车见车爆胎、打遍天下无敌手、情场杀手鬼见愁、沉鱼落雁、闭月羞花、晕倒一片、迷死一帮
神武英明，盖世无双，人见人爱，花见花开，打遍天下无敌手，情场杀手鬼见愁；人面桃花，倾国倾城，沉鱼落雁，闭月羞花，心地善良，晕倒一片
我是英俊潇洒、玉树临风、天下无敌、人见人爱、花见花开、气死潘安、羞死宋玉、号称一朵梨花压海棠、宇宙第一高手,人送绰号玉面小飞龙、山崩地裂水倒流鬼见愁、美貌与智慧结合、英雄与侠义化身
天下无敌宇宙无双人见人爱花见花开男女老幼一律统杀金刚不坏旋风霹雳任意风格
神武英明盖世无双，人见人爱花见花开，打遍天下无敌手，情场杀手鬼见愁玉面飞龙，人称美貌无双心地善良，晕倒一片
宇宙超级无敌霹雳人见人爱花见花开车见车载十全九美青春美少女
玉树临风.风流潇洒
妩媚伶俐、天下无双、人见人爱、花见花开、车见车爆胎、打遍天下无敌手、情场杀手鬼见愁、沉鱼落雁、闭月羞花、晕倒一片、迷死一帮
神武英明，盖世无双，人见人爱，花见花开，打遍天下无敌手，情场杀手鬼见愁；人面桃花，倾国倾城，沉鱼落雁，闭月羞花，心地善良，晕倒一片
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
feminine fluid（又一篇来自肉麻恋爱博客）｛少儿大大地不不宜｝
有一天，男孩子和女孩子调情：
"""
女：［温心地 ］快过节了，我送你什么呢？
男：不用了吧。我不需要什么
女：［明显不放弃、顽皮地］，我想给你点东西，我能给你什么呢？
男：［大喜道］我想想，女孩子能给男孩子。。。恐怕最珍贵地是她身上的水吧？
女：真的？［不知道他部下何等陷阱］
男：如果你给我，我想你的泪水，如果你为我哭，你一定爱我。
女：喔［叹！还好，不是太肉麻］
男：其实先想到的是你的汗水，不过叫你给我干活，但是，这个好像不如泪水。
女：［高兴些］喔。［口音跟前面那个喔大有不同，心口暗笑］
男：我还想要你的口水！！［眼睛一亮，以为在她松弛的时候占了便宜］
女：喂！！［突然不妙，大叫］
男：喂！！！［更响］我是说！我是说！！我还要你说我的好话。你想什么?［险、汉！］
女：对谁说？
男：当然对我说了！！
女：喔［前两个喔之间的喔、迷茫］
男：当然，还有别的水......
女：还有？还有什么水？［不知所错］
男：还有胯间之水！
女：［糟糕！］喂！！！！！ 你！说！！什么？？？
男：喂！你又想什么了？我是说羊水。
女：［羞晕，但是他明显不怀好意，害羞，又觉得自己想知道他原意是说什么水，又觉得自己明知道他原意是什么怎么还在想？羞！又觉得羞什么他怎么不害羞？我晕什么？］
女：你！你！！我就是有羊水也不是给你用地。哼！！［对着他哼地，哼得太用劲，头晕!! 掉头要走，太晕，半回头］
男：不给算了！［她这几日妹力大有精进，被哼的连退三步，勉强吐出这句话］
男：是你问我要什么。［氧气没提上来，后面半句太小声了，连自己都没听见］
女：［暗喜，好险，如果真地说那个，我还不知道怎么对付呢！］
男：［暗喜，好险，如果她要给我那个水，我还不知道怎么对付呢！］
"""
narrator：你们到底要交换什么水呀！！！？？？这边都读糊涂了
"""
女：哼！少装
"""
narrator: 哇靠，晕了还哼得这么响！！！ 佩服！！！！
"""
男：喂！别打我女人的主意！！
"""
narrator: 好、好、好、惹不得主人公。若要知他们交换何等液体肉麻多久，且听下回分解!
"""
女：［温心地 ］快过节了，我送你什么呢？
男：不用了吧。我不需要什么
女：［明显不放弃、顽皮地］，我想给你点东西，我能给你什么呢？
男：［大喜道］我想想，女孩子能给男孩子。。。恐怕最珍贵地是她身上的水吧？
女：真的？［不知道他部下何等陷阱］
男：如果你给我，我想你的泪水，如果你为我哭，你一定爱我。
女：喔［叹！还好，不是太肉麻］
男：其实先想到的是你的汗水，不过叫你给我干活，但是，这个好像不如泪水。
女：［高兴些］喔。［口音跟前面那个喔大有不同，心口暗笑］
男：我还想要你的口水！！［眼睛一亮，以为在她松弛的时候占了便宜］
女：喂！！［突然不妙，大叫］
男：喂！！！［更响］我是说！我是说！！我还要你说我的好话。你想什么?［险、汉！］
女：对谁说？
男：当然对我说了！！
女：喔［前两个喔之间的喔、迷茫］
男：当然，还有别的水......
女：还有？还有什么水？［不知所错］
男：还有胯间之水！
女：［糟糕！］喂！！！！！ 你！说！！什么？？？
男：喂！你又想什么了？我是说羊水。
女：［羞晕，但是他明显不怀好意，害羞，又觉得自己想知道他原意是说什么水，又觉得自己明知道他原意是什么怎么还在想？羞！又觉得羞什么他怎么不害羞？我晕什么？］
女：你！你！！我就是有羊水也不是给你用地。哼！！［对着他哼地，哼得太用劲，头晕!! 掉头要走，太晕，半回头］
男：不给算了！［她这几日妹力大有精进，被哼的连退三步，勉强吐出这句话］
男：是你问我要什么。［氧气没提上来，后面半句太小声了，连自己都没听见］
女：［暗喜，好险，如果真地说那个，我还不知道怎么对付呢！］
男：［暗喜，好险，如果她要给我那个水，我还不知道怎么对付呢！］
"""
narrator：你们到底要交换什么水呀！！！？？？这边都读糊涂了
"""
女：哼！少装
"""
narrator: 哇靠，晕了还哼得这么响！！！ 佩服！！！！
"""
男：喂！别打我女人的主意！！
"""
narrator: 好、好、好、惹不得主人公。若要知他们交换何等液体肉麻多久，且听下回分解!
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
American football (watercooler conversation during deflationary period)
Chinese co-worker to Korean co-worker:
"Do you know why Americans play American football?"
"no, why?"
"Because it's easy to make. If you ever look at a deflated football, it's 4 pieces of rhombus shaped leather sewed together."
"ahhh..."
"Well!, that's not exactly how it's made,"
says one upset normal co-worker listening to the conversation...
"See, your parents are so cheap, they bought you the cheapest football in the store. The higher end ones are actually not rhombus shaped, they have a curvature that makes the football more... football like."
"burn!"
screamed other normal co-workers...
"Do you know why Americans play American football?"
"no, why?"
"Because it's easy to make. If you ever look at a deflated football, it's 4 pieces of rhombus shaped leather sewed together."
"ahhh..."
"Well!, that's not exactly how it's made,"
says one upset normal co-worker listening to the conversation...
"See, your parents are so cheap, they bought you the cheapest football in the store. The higher end ones are actually not rhombus shaped, they have a curvature that makes the football more... football like."
"burn!"
screamed other normal co-workers...
Saturday, November 15, 2008
IM-Sex {{adult material!!! 少儿不宜。}}
H:你的白白的小手。。。。
H:轻轻的
H:碰到
H:胆小地
H:渴望地
H:伸过去
H:她的身体颤抖着，期望着
她。。。。
她。。。
有 点冷
也可能是冷得颤抖
你碰到她了
她吓得一跳
她那寒冷地颤抖着的胸脯
你碰了一下但是收回手
她大叫：“不！！！“
”不！！不要离开！！“
她把你的手拉回胸口
用你的手抚摸着
按揉着越来越敏感的。。。
奶头子，
越来越感，期待着爱的奶子
她似乎高潮了
浑身抽筋似地颤抖,把你紧紧地抱着，她的激情包围了你的身体。
[你以为故事完了吧？]
你正准备起床逃脱这个你不想告诉以后男朋友的一刻。
但是她扑象你
用赤裸裸的浑身把你拖回床上
你。。。
你想拒绝
但是又有一股极大的力量
是好奇的力量
欲望的力量
（她的，你的，你们的欲望）
一个你不懂的力量，把你绑再床上
。。。。。。
哦，对了，是她用围巾把你的是手脚绑在床头柜和床档上
然后
然后
她迫不及待的把头埋在你的腿之间。
你
你不懂
她要干什么？？？？？？
二唇，起初，互相调戏着、挤压着、抿含着、玩弄着。后来互相狂吻，热乎乎，沾粘粘。
她在干什么？？？（你的脑袋里大叫着，她在干什么？）
但是，
这个问题很快被另外一个
没有声音的声音覆盖了。
你的浑身
突然慢慢地那热而不觉的熔岩漫到边缘。
浑身都充满了她的滚烫的爱
软了
痒了
出汉了
不！ 不对，不是汉！！
反正，反正，浑身都湿了
更软了
更痒了
更湿了
更！更！！更！！！。。。。。。。
但是！！但是！！！不能，但是！！！
妳
她
妳
她
妳们
!
没有声音了
没有你，没有她，没有妳们了。。。。
只有一床的湿润。。。。。
纯洁的暧昧
温柔地抚摸着
恋恋不舍
难分难解
不想完，要永远永远这样
爱
“爽！！！！！”
她突然大叫
打破了妳那处女初次的陶醉。
“我走了!”
“明天还要上班呢!!”
“什么？？”
你觉得好突然呀。。。。
她怎么。。。
她。。。。难到跟我感觉不一样吗？
但是她已经走了
把妳落潮湿的遗失中。妳在颤抖，但是，这一次，是妳冷了。她不在了
妳冷了。。。。好想她呀。
H:轻轻的
H:碰到
H:胆小地
H:渴望地
H:伸过去
H:她的身体颤抖着，期望着
她。。。。
她。。。
有 点冷
也可能是冷得颤抖
你碰到她了
她吓得一跳
她那寒冷地颤抖着的胸脯
你碰了一下但是收回手
她大叫：“不！！！“
”不！！不要离开！！“
她把你的手拉回胸口
用你的手抚摸着
按揉着越来越敏感的。。。
奶头子，
越来越感，期待着爱的奶子
她似乎高潮了
浑身抽筋似地颤抖,把你紧紧地抱着，她的激情包围了你的身体。
[你以为故事完了吧？]
你正准备起床逃脱这个你不想告诉以后男朋友的一刻。
但是她扑象你
用赤裸裸的浑身把你拖回床上
你。。。
你想拒绝
但是又有一股极大的力量
是好奇的力量
欲望的力量
（她的，你的，你们的欲望）
一个你不懂的力量，把你绑再床上
。。。。。。
哦，对了，是她用围巾把你的是手脚绑在床头柜和床档上
然后
然后
她迫不及待的把头埋在你的腿之间。
你
你不懂
她要干什么？？？？？？
二唇，起初，互相调戏着、挤压着、抿含着、玩弄着。后来互相狂吻，热乎乎，沾粘粘。
她在干什么？？？（你的脑袋里大叫着，她在干什么？）
但是，
这个问题很快被另外一个
没有声音的声音覆盖了。
你的浑身
突然慢慢地那热而不觉的熔岩漫到边缘。
浑身都充满了她的滚烫的爱
软了
痒了
出汉了
不！ 不对，不是汉！！
反正，反正，浑身都湿了
更软了
更痒了
更湿了
更！更！！更！！！。。。。。。。
但是！！但是！！！不能，但是！！！
妳
她
妳
她
妳们
!
没有声音了
没有你，没有她，没有妳们了。。。。
只有一床的湿润。。。。。
纯洁的暧昧
温柔地抚摸着
恋恋不舍
难分难解
不想完，要永远永远这样
爱
“爽！！！！！”
她突然大叫
打破了妳那处女初次的陶醉。
“我走了!”
“明天还要上班呢!!”
“什么？？”
你觉得好突然呀。。。。
她怎么。。。
她。。。。难到跟我感觉不一样吗？
但是她已经走了
把妳落潮湿的遗失中。妳在颤抖，但是，这一次，是妳冷了。她不在了
妳冷了。。。。好想她呀。
Thursday, November 06, 2008
when to get married
摘自肉麻恋爱博客
"""
问：什么时候知道两个人可以好下去？可以有美好的婚姻？
答：如果两个人谈时把自己过去的故事讲完了，然后再讲一便，还互相感兴趣，还想听，那么他们可能会好下去了。
答2：互相制造新故事觉得都很过瘾、也可能会好下去。
"""
"""
问：什么时候知道两个人可以好下去？可以有美好的婚姻？
答：如果两个人谈时把自己过去的故事讲完了，然后再讲一便，还互相感兴趣，还想听，那么他们可能会好下去了。
答2：互相制造新故事觉得都很过瘾、也可能会好下去。
"""
Thursday, September 11, 2008
here's the full quote
A Prairie Home Companion Movie Soundtrack Lyrics
Woody Harrelson & John C. Reilly – Bad Jokes
The blind man's seein' eye dog
Pissed on the blind man's shoe
The blinds man said, "Here, Rover
Here's a piece of beef for you"
His wife said, "Don't reward him
You can't just let that pass"
The blind man said
"I gotta find his mouth
So I can kick him in the ass"
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
You got one, Dusty?
I got one, Lefty.
Let's hear it.
When God created woman
He gave her not two breasts but three
When the middle one got in the way
God performed surgery
Woman stood before God
With the middle breast in hand
Said, "What do we do
With the useless boob?"
And God created man
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
Gramps turned eighty the other day
And everybody was there
And he was dressed up in a brand new suit
Sitting in his big armchair
When a beautiful young naked woman
Stood up in front of the group
She offered Gramps some super sex
And he said, "I'll take the soup"
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
You ready for another one?
Yeah, lay it on me.
Ole went to the neighborhood dance
And he won the big door prize
It was a toilet brush
And he took it home
And the next week one of the guys
Said, "Ole, how's that toilet brush?
The one you won from the neighbors?"
Ole said, "Oh, it works pretty good
But I prefer toilet paper"
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
The farmer had a champion bull
Who bred 200 times a year
The farmer's wife said, "200 times?
Isn't that wonderful, dear?
Maybe you ought to watch him
Maybe he'll show you how"
The farmer said, "He's a heck of a bull
But it wasn't all with the same cow"
Come on, now, bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
You've got another one, Dusty?
Actually I do
Did you hear about the Viagra shipment that got stolen?
No, who they think did it?
Well, they don't know, but they're on the lookout for hardened criminals.
You got another one?
I got another one, Lefty.
Sven said to his friend,
"Boy, I think my wife died."
His friend said,
"Well, what do you mean, you think?"
"Well, the sex is still the same,
but the dishes are stackin' up."
Hey, Dusty.
Yeah, Lefty?
Did you know that diarrhea was hereditary?
No, I didn't.
Yeah, it runs in your jeans.
Hey, uh, heh, Lefty?
Yeah? Go ahead.
Why do they call it PMS?
PMS? Why, I don't know. Why?
'Cause Mad Cow was already taken.
Hey, Dusty.
Yeah, Lefty?
What do you get when you cross holy water with castor oil?
I don't know, Lefty. What do you get?
A religious movement.
Hey, uh... hey, Lefty, what did the elephant say to the naked man?
What'd he say?
It's cute, but can you really breathe through that thing?
Come on, now.
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
Bad jokes
Man, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad...whoo...jokes for me
Woody Harrelson & John C. Reilly – Bad Jokes
The blind man's seein' eye dog
Pissed on the blind man's shoe
The blinds man said, "Here, Rover
Here's a piece of beef for you"
His wife said, "Don't reward him
You can't just let that pass"
The blind man said
"I gotta find his mouth
So I can kick him in the ass"
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
You got one, Dusty?
I got one, Lefty.
Let's hear it.
When God created woman
He gave her not two breasts but three
When the middle one got in the way
God performed surgery
Woman stood before God
With the middle breast in hand
Said, "What do we do
With the useless boob?"
And God created man
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
Gramps turned eighty the other day
And everybody was there
And he was dressed up in a brand new suit
Sitting in his big armchair
When a beautiful young naked woman
Stood up in front of the group
She offered Gramps some super sex
And he said, "I'll take the soup"
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
You ready for another one?
Yeah, lay it on me.
Ole went to the neighborhood dance
And he won the big door prize
It was a toilet brush
And he took it home
And the next week one of the guys
Said, "Ole, how's that toilet brush?
The one you won from the neighbors?"
Ole said, "Oh, it works pretty good
But I prefer toilet paper"
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
The farmer had a champion bull
Who bred 200 times a year
The farmer's wife said, "200 times?
Isn't that wonderful, dear?
Maybe you ought to watch him
Maybe he'll show you how"
The farmer said, "He's a heck of a bull
But it wasn't all with the same cow"
Come on, now, bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
You've got another one, Dusty?
Actually I do
Did you hear about the Viagra shipment that got stolen?
No, who they think did it?
Well, they don't know, but they're on the lookout for hardened criminals.
You got another one?
I got another one, Lefty.
Sven said to his friend,
"Boy, I think my wife died."
His friend said,
"Well, what do you mean, you think?"
"Well, the sex is still the same,
but the dishes are stackin' up."
Hey, Dusty.
Yeah, Lefty?
Did you know that diarrhea was hereditary?
No, I didn't.
Yeah, it runs in your jeans.
Hey, uh, heh, Lefty?
Yeah? Go ahead.
Why do they call it PMS?
PMS? Why, I don't know. Why?
'Cause Mad Cow was already taken.
Hey, Dusty.
Yeah, Lefty?
What do you get when you cross holy water with castor oil?
I don't know, Lefty. What do you get?
A religious movement.
Hey, uh... hey, Lefty, what did the elephant say to the naked man?
What'd he say?
It's cute, but can you really breathe through that thing?
Come on, now.
Bad jokes
Lord, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad jokes for me
Bad jokes
Man, I love 'em
Bad jokes
Can't get enough of 'em
Ooowhee
Bad...whoo...jokes for me
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
on butts and knots
okay, after a lot of soul searching I finally resolved the problem that has bugged me for years...
In talking about girls' feminine features, we often speak of their 屁股，如果是说斯文点就是臀(tun2)部。
但是记得小时候，妈妈买过什么dian4子肉。（所以也说过某女子之dian4部,被人取笑一番）。但是不服气，明明记得买过那个肉，问了一大转，和多个朋友，而且还有跟女生们深入研究，终究还是达到一个结论，就是，我妈妈当年是不是不认字，把臀读成殿？网上还有人开玩笑说什么读字只读一半什么的。
把百度，谷歌搜完了，被无数女孩子笑话后，还是找不到有人用猪臀部做菜。更不觉的当年妈妈卖国猪屁股肉。明明买了“电字肉”。小时候记忆力很好，不会记错呀！！！
。
。
。
。
。
后来，发现好像那个东西叫腱子肉。(也是一道菜)
This is the piece of meat leading up to the butt and torso.... So... actually, I wasn't that far off, and in some instances, that piece of meat is considerably sexy:
so...., finally, guys, and girls, watch those 腱子肉of yours. ;-)
oh, and for the people out there who do cook meat, this piece of meat appears both in cows and in pigs.
sigh, this blog entry cannot do the humor and irony of my situation justice...
[[continuation]]
So, it turns out that after our online conversation, the girl went and talked to her mom about it....
Sigh,
I said to her,
you're supposed to show me the jiazirou, and NOT tell your mom; don't tell her and not show me... it kind of put me in a really bad light, don't you think?
sigh....
In talking about girls' feminine features, we often speak of their 屁股，如果是说斯文点就是臀(tun2)部。
但是记得小时候，妈妈买过什么dian4子肉。（所以也说过某女子之dian4部,被人取笑一番）。但是不服气，明明记得买过那个肉，问了一大转，和多个朋友，而且还有跟女生们深入研究，终究还是达到一个结论，就是，我妈妈当年是不是不认字，把臀读成殿？网上还有人开玩笑说什么读字只读一半什么的。
把百度，谷歌搜完了，被无数女孩子笑话后，还是找不到有人用猪臀部做菜。更不觉的当年妈妈卖国猪屁股肉。明明买了“电字肉”。小时候记忆力很好，不会记错呀！！！
。
。
。
。
。
后来，发现好像那个东西叫腱子肉。(也是一道菜)
This is the piece of meat leading up to the butt and torso.... So... actually, I wasn't that far off, and in some instances, that piece of meat is considerably sexy:
Or...
so...., finally, guys, and girls, watch those 腱子肉of yours. ;-)
oh, and for the people out there who do cook meat, this piece of meat appears both in cows and in pigs.
sigh, this blog entry cannot do the humor and irony of my situation justice...
[[continuation]]
So, it turns out that after our online conversation, the girl went and talked to her mom about it....
Sigh,
I said to her,
you're supposed to show me the jiazirou, and NOT tell your mom; don't tell her and not show me... it kind of put me in a really bad light, don't you think?
sigh....
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