Knocked up

"""


Knocked up, though initially appearing to be a very cruel movie about white-trash, good-for-nothing, poor, weed smoking insult to American Jews. Eventually, it turned out to be a sweet heart warming comedy about coming together, and revival of a certain American spirit.

The movie starts with some frat-like partying of some unemployeed friends living in LA. they identify themselves as Jews by joking about hair, and various cultural events. The happy, but ultimately depressing circumstance is that they have been losers for several generations. Ben Stone, is an unemployed single guy who "only smokes weed in the morning". It is eventually revealed that Ben's father, has a life filled with divorses and drug consumption. Supposedly, this is a fairly strong insult on the Stone family, if it existed for real.

Alison is a hot blonde who got a job with E! entertainment (on camera), and parties until she has unprotected sex with Ben and becomes pregnant--"Knocked Up".

Ben is not a responsible person and has no job nor any skills. After finding out that he's knocked up Alison, he becomes a sweet and increasingly responsible person and takes on a job, asks Alison to marry him, and persists, after she refuses(while pregnant), until she does. Finally, he becomes the "man" of the family successfully dealing with very stressful time with controlling family member (Alison's sister), Surprise disappearance of Alison's doctor (at a Bar Mitzvahs, of all things), and over bearing professional Asian doctor who threaten to quit when Alison made unusual request about the birth procedure...

So, all's well that ends well... But it sure got a little messed up there for a while when for entire scenes at a time, the movie is entirely dedicated to the display of various disgusting American traits on some poor Jewish people.

Being a fellow over weight person (Ben's a little chubby), I think it's a good story that he got a hot blonde chick so easily... Even if he had to become a family man eventually.


"""

I am nobody! Who are you?

I'm nobody! Who are you?
Are you nobody, too?
Then there's a pair of us--don't tell!
They'd banish us, you know.

How dreary to be somebody!
How public, like a frog
To tell your name the livelong day
To an admiring bog!


--Emily Dickinson

half way into the date

guy: "Did anybody tell you that you are too good to be true?"
girl:"No, but they did tell me that I'm too truthfully to be good."
[girl:"Oh, and? btw! You suck!"]

万事皆上品，唯有计算低

读书的人，不管是读什么，学业不成，没有工作，就搞计算机。我见到地就有本来是学化学，化工，物理，机械, 土木, 艺术，生物，数学，体育，还有个搞音乐。难道，真的就这么容易吗？难道高计算机真的是最后的选择吗？

Just because you are full of shit

Coworker:"""

Just be cause you are full of shit, don't assume the rest of us are.


"""

Defensive guy with performance anxiety

"hey! hey!! watch it!! I'm not gay, just a little retarded that's all."

Jealous Chinese dude

Jealous Chinese dude says:

"All Chinese girls want to fuck is white men and Chinese guys who went to Tsinghua."

... after a minute..., and couple more shots...
"All that a Chinese girl wants to fuck is white man, black man, rich man, and Chinese guys who went to Tsinghua University."

... Another minute passes...

"All that a Chinese girl wants to fuck are white men, black men, rich men, smart men, men with reasonably large dick, and Chinese "men" who went to Tsinghua University."

... Then after another copule of minutes... his brain said...

"Oh... you mean they're girls?"

argument with dad

son: [insults dad]
dad: yeah, well at least I had your mom!

Some sayings

"Our meetings took place in a curious atomsphere of assumed consensus"
--Arthur Schlesinger Jr.


"Worldly wisdom teaches that it is better for reputation to fail conventionally then to succeed unconventionally."
The General Theory of Employment, Interest, and Money,
--John Maynard Keynes.

"While markets appear to work in practice, we are not sure how they work in theory"
-- Maureen O'Hara

poem from volkswagen commercial

Conflict boils over like an angry sludge
Politicians lie to us like they've got a grudge
We're in a decaying spiral of fevered verocity
.
.
.
Hope, springs !!

An extra degree of freedom

In addition to "Free as in beer", and "Free as in speech", another use of Free is "Is this girl free to date", and "Is this waffle free for the taking". In the sense that it is unclaimed, unallocated(disk blocks for example), and uncommitted(girls w/o bf's).



So, next time when somebody says: "Is this free?" you have yet another liberty to consider. ;-)

Fun work place conversation

Men and women:

Men and women..., said a coworker one day, are like propeller air planes and internal combustion engine cars... One, though primitive, can be jump started just by playing with the propellers... where as the other one, however advanced, and computer controlled, when the battery dies, there's nothing u can do about it...

bfb(from gmail list)

Rotten Bay Losers is one of Bay Area's premier Chinese gathering organization. After a few long years of very tough American scholastic work, these enterprising Chinese young men and young women gather in their off-hours to drink, eat, and to enjoy all the merriments of life.

The Rotten Bay Loser women are the most attractive among all of Chinese women. This is not so impressive, except that that is a population almost a half of a quarter of the entire human race. They are black blonde's: their long curly hair... drenched in pheromone, constantly luring the male losers. Their twinkly eyes, possess the same qualities as the geisha's..., with one longing glimpse, she can bring a man to his knees. Their heads, always held high, nobly. Their elegant arms, slender, flexible as any Indian yogi's, clean as jade, soft as tofu, yet strong as an ox so as to be able to carry babies. Their torsos, never overweight, never quite covered correctly, inspire a sense of controversy, always moving with the grace of Arabian belly dancers. And the legs, their beautiful, sexy Amazonian legs comes with guarantee to shrink any man's pants. The songs of the Loser's women are in yet another league of their own.

So, next time, when you visit the bay, make sure to join the rotten losers, where you can meet these gorgeously rotten babes.

wedding vow

[standing in the ocean naked] (from Thank God You are Here)

Men:
When I'm wet,
You are wet,
When I'm dry,
you are dry,
When I sing,
you listen.

the general applicability of probability

"There are very few things that is neither probable or improbable"

To heir is human

(it sounds a little like "to error is human", hehe)

What does that girl do for me?

Her smile, on our initial encounter, is gently scorched into my mind.

When the dogs bite, (the fecal matter still all over my palette)
Then the bees sting, (the backstabbing knife still bleeding red)
When you're feeling sad, (and the pickpocket's hands still in my wallet)
I simply think of my favorite things..... (that burning smile, in my head)
And I don't feel soooooo baddddddd.

big titles

While partying wildly with a very sexy friend recently, I some how thought of Shirley Temple. (Leave it to San Francisco to make this kind of thing happen)

So apparently, Shirley was an ambassador to ..., and received a powerful title of: Omnipotentiary or Plentipotentiary. (I can't seem to find a reference to either, but both are titles). Anyways, it's an interesting thing... to be some-thing-largely-potent-iary.

女大当驾，男大当昏

soap

This, from All My Children:

Dad: I loved you so much, and all I wanted is respect and obedience...
Son: No! Dad! you never loved me, you only loved that I came from you and will grow to be you!
[[dad, at this point, has deadly drug hooked up in the guy's wife's neck, and the guy has a remote switch that detonates if he releases, and the dad has shot the guy's shoulder with a guy, and is waving the gun around threatening more shots..]]